MADISON (Wis.) – Just hours after being linked to the vacant Maryland Terrapins head coaching job, Brian Kelly has been rumored to be seeking the same, soon-to-be-vacant position at the university of wisconsin, Off Tackle Republic can exclusively report.
"Ah jeez," said Kelly, in a Sconnie accent tinged with that Duke's Mayo twang, "If what 'dose guys up 'dere in Madison need is a cooooach, I'll hafta do my best."
Kelly continued, "What ya can be sure of, though, is dat we won't be losin' anymore of them offensive linemen outta Ocononomo– Ocomonon– point is, I can't wait'ta get my mouth on some-a them cheese curds."
Representatives from the badger athletic department and for Kelly, currently an analyst with CBS Sports, could not immediately be reached for comment. Off Tackle Republic will update this post when more relevant details become available.
