What games are on tap this weekend?

If you're reading this, you've survived most of another week in the dystopian hellscape that we're all currently inhabiting. Having the opportunity to unwind for a few hours by cheering on your favorite football team (or taking joy in the failure of everyone else's trasch-ass teams) doesn't really feel like adequate consolation for, well....*waves around at everything*. But at least it's something.

Here's a quick rundown of the Big Ten lineup for the upcoming weekend. This is not (at least not in this first incarnation) a picks column. I'm terrible at picking games. But what it will feature is one thing I'm looking forward to about each Big Ten contest this weekend, starting with:

Northwestern @ U.S.C. (Friday, 9:00 pm EST, Fox), USC -14.5

O.K., off to a rough start here. I guess I'm looking forward to the fact that I'll probably be doing something else while this game is being played. The only time I've taken pleasure in U.S.C. unloading on Northwestern was the 1996 Rose Bowl, and that was purely out of spite.

#2 Indiana @ Penn State (Saturday, 12:00 pm EST, Fox), Indiana -14.5

I'm looking forward to seeing if Penn State still has enough pride to make Indiana work for the win. I'm also looking forward to getting some actual data to validate my hypothesis that a 14.5-point spread for this game is way too low.

#1 Ohio State @ Purdue (Saturday, 1:00 pm EST, BTN), OSU - 30.5 (!)

Hopefully, this game will feature Lincoln Kienholz and Ohio State's backups getting a lot of run. And I'm really, really looking forward to putting Ohio State's history of Harborings in West Lafayette into the past tense. Come on, guys. Don't let me down.

Maryland @ Rutgers (Saturday, 2:30 pm EST, FS1), Rutgers -2.5

You know how I said up above that it was hard to find something to look forward to for the NU/USC game? That goes double for this one. I guess I'm thankful that I won't be watching it.

#8 Oregon @ #20 Iowa (Saturday, 3:30 pm EST, CBS), Oregon - 6.5

This might be the most entertaining game of the weekend. Not because of anything that's going to happen on the field, but because this will be the time for most of us to watch, point, and laugh as our new feathered brethren get their first exposure to Kinnick Stadium, where fun, entertaining football goes to die. I know I'll be tuned in to this one. And most of you probably will be, too, you sickos.

#23 Washington @ Wisconsin (4:30 pm EST, BTN), Washington - 10.5

There's a lot of really weird start times this weekend. Fans of the other Quadrangle teams can look forward to mocking Wisconsin as the Badgers continue their quest for a winless Big Ten season. But the social scientist in me wants more data to quantify the difference between Home Washington and Road Washington. Home Washington would be a 20+ point favorite in this one. But the Huskies' powers seem to be significantly diminished when they leave Seattle. Not enough to lose to wisconsin, though, because.....

Nebraska @ U.C.L.A. (9:00 pm EST, Fox), U.C.L.A. - 1.5

I guess I'm interested in seeing if, with a week of practice, Nebraska's backup quarterback, T.J. Lateef, can manage more than the 1 YPA (not a typo) he posted last week after Dylan Raiola went down with a broken leg. I wish him and the Huskers well, but I am feeling decidedly pessimistic. As I noted in a comment at the other place, I suspect an improvement in the Huskers' fortunes might require a visit to the team dentist, which would involve Lateef being pulled.

But that's enough of me nattering on. What are YOU looking forward to about this weekend's matchups? Please lay your wishes bare in the comments, so everyone else can point and laugh when they don't come true.