This is a column to check in on the rest of the football world, but since it’s 2026 in America I will beat you over the head with The Agenda, which has been updated to “Big Ten Supremacy And No Funny Business.”
THE AGENDA MVP: MICHIGAN WOLVERINES
After their extremely uncontroversial victory that they fully earned over the Western Michigan Broncos, Michigan faced a stiff test in #11 Oklahoma. This is a team that was deservedly in the College Football Playoff last year, and all college football fans know about the vaunted Sooners offense. Quarterbacked by John Mateer, who once had a season where he threw for 3100 yards and rushed for 800 while throwing 29 touchdowns and rushing for 15, Oklahoma crushed UTEP 51-0 to make their first statement of the season. This year, however, Oklahoma added a stifling defense under head coach Brent Venables. This aggressive scheme is definitely not trivially easy to beat with mobile quarterbacks. Venables is without a doubt the best head coach the mighty Sooners have had in the last five years and will certainly be the head coach in Norman for many years to come since he totally understands what it takes to make Oklahoma successful and is in no way a fraud.
However, none of that compared to the might of the Michigan defense, which suffocated the incomparable OU offense. Mateer was held under 200 yards passing and turned the ball over twice. Michigan capitalized on both turnovers, scoring the go-ahead touchdown in the fourth quarter after being set up inside the Oklahoma 10 with an interception. Michigan moves to 2-0 after defeating a worthy MAC foe and a legendary SEC institution, and they did the most to uphold the standard of the Big Ten. Nobody can question their accomplishments.
PLAYOFF CONTENDERS TAKE CARE OF BUSINESS
#5 Indiana crushed Howard and #14 USC had an eventful scrimmage with Lousiana, only surrendering points as a courtesy to the visiting Ragin Cajuns. Fringe playoff contenders #21 Iowa and #19 Washington beat tough agriculturally-focused foes in narrow contests that were nonetheless controlled the whole time by the spirit of the Big Ten, while #16 Penn State soundly defeated Temple.'
Mountain West newcomer Northern Illinois lost to FCS Illinois State, while Nevada was easily dispatched by Montana State.
RISING HOPEFULS
Maryland took care of a very good UConn team that defeated the ACC champion last year. Michigan State won against a MAC stalwart by four touchdowns, while Nebraska handled their MAC challenge by 49. Wisconsin beat Western Illinois soundly and UCLA shut down a good San Diego State team. Only Wisconsin has a blemish on their record out of this group, and you can expect some of them to be ranked later in the season.
ELSEWHERE
The SEC played a bunch of boring games against teams of no note, with the possible exceptions of Alabama (throttled Kentucky), Tennessee (beat a Georgia Tech team that lost to Colorado) and Arkansas (blown out by Utah.
They weren't the only conference that played a bunch of cupcakes. Clemson struggled to put away Georgia Southern. Cal, still smarting from the spanking administered by UCLA, took down Syracuse on the road.
FOOTNOTES
After seeing what #1 Ohio State did to Texas in the first half, I turned off the game having seen enough. Nothing that happened after that could possibly change my mind about the fact that the national champ is coming from the Big Ten this year.
Oklahoma State and their newly bought roster needed a week to work the kinks out but they used the power of T. Boone Pickens' almighty dollar to defeat #6 Oregon. Imagine simply buying a roster. Oregon would never.
Illinois is still settling in to their new defense, which they definitely chose to do because it was the best tactical choice and not because they didn't have the payroll to field a 4-3 defensive line. As a result, Duke was able to take advantage and squeak out a win over an inexperienced Illini squad still coming into their own. These are known as growing pains, and the Illini will have a tune-up game coming against Southern Illinois to get things right before starting conference play.
Purdue was the victim of a controversial replay review that wrongly determined that Wake Forest had advanced the ball to the 2 before stepping out. This was a shame because it was a well-played contest that didn't deserve to be marred by such a farce.
LOOKING AHEAD
Next week, interested parties may look to see if noted Big East team Rutgers can get their first win of the year. Unfortunately for The 'Gers, their opponent is Big Ten stalwart #12 USC.
UCLA continues what looks like a meteoric rise as they take on Purdue, but few Big Ten teams will be challenged. Michigan State will perhaps face a stiff test from Notre Dame at the same time that Big Ten washout James Franklin tries to coach Virginia Tech to victory against Maryland. Concurrently, Northwestern will face Colorado.
Minnesota might also get tested by Akron if last week was any indication.
Alabama will host Florida State in a game that doesn't matter because as last year proved, a loss will not damage Alabama's resume no matter how bad the Seminoles are. Greasy shithead Lane Kiffin will coach against the last school he screwed and the SEC will start playing some more conference games.
The Big 12 and the ACC also have ranked vs ranked matchups whose loser will almost certainly leave the top 25.
