MNW: Good Friday morning, and welcome to another edition of the installation formerly known as the Obligatory Predictions Competition.
As fans trickled out of Lambeau in the fourth quarter as the Packers trail the Falcons by three scores, Prime Video put up a graphic of the moon showing that it was, apparently, called a "Possum-Huntin' Moon".
This appears, as far as I can tell from a cursory Google search, to be a complete fiction. As someone who enjoys making up things and saying them authoritatively, though, I am all for it. I hope this year's DePaul-Northwestern basketball Battle for the Mayor's Key takes place by the light of the constellation Crustulum Cucurbitae, known to appear in the sky for just a couple weeks in late November and early December.
About Last Week
Thoughts:
- Yep, we continue to suck, going 7 games under .500 this week.
- glassjawed is tearing it UP in straight-up picks, batting a cool .920.
- Still winning!
Picks
Friday, Sept 25
Northwestern Wildcats @ (5) Indiana Hoosiers
7:00pm | FOX | Indiana -21 | O/U: 49.5
ATS: Indiana 9-5 | Straight Up: All Indiana
Buffkomodo: I think the mobile nature of Chiles perplexes Indiana initially. Not enough for northwestern to win but enough to cover a 21 point spread.
Transient Buckeye: Northwestern has looked pretty spunky so far. Not enough to go on the road and win. But can they stay within 21? Maybe.
IUinVA: It looks like a lot of points, but Cignetti has out-scored B1G opponents by an average of 26.5 points/game during his two seasons in Bloomington. My initial reaction was that Northwestern covers, but since I suck at predictions, I’m going against my gut. Hoover missed Marsh on two touchdowns last week (the other incompletions are nit-picky), but he still leads the conference and is second in the nation in passer rating. The defense has been playing a lot of soft zone and keeping it vanilla, but they’re moving as a unit and making plays when they need to. This team may be sand-bagging, but is now ready to show what they can do in a meaningful game.
misdreavus79: Death Star has had two “not death starry” games this season, which is Concerning™. No chance in hell they lose, but Northwestern can keep it within the number, like Western Kentucky and North Texas did. Indiana 30, Northwestern 10
RockyMtnBlue: Remember back when it was sheerest folly to bet against Indiana covering the spread? Me neither. Hoosiers 35-10
Thumpasaurus: Would be deeply annoying to me personally if Nern hung around in this one. Book it: Cats to cover
MNW: Northwestern will need its offensive line protection to be better, its secondary to cover tighter and more effectively, and its running game to chew clock and be much more efficient. That, or Aidan Chiles to go absolutely nuts.
Indiana has been able to save it up for this game, and they've got the horses who – if and when they get a couple early stops – should be able to put the after-burners on and create some distance. Hoosiers, 38-13.
Saturday, Sept 26
Illinois Fighting Illini @ (1) Ohio State Buckeyes
11:00am | FOX | OSU -27.5 | O/U: 53.5
ATS: OSU 9-5 | Straight Up: All OSU
Buffkomodo: Ohio state wins big because they want to.
Transient Buckeye: That spread is way too big. The IlliBuck will stay right where it belongs, but Illinois covers.
IUinVA: It’s an Ohio State blowout. C’mon, we all know this.
misdreavus79: Same as above. Illinois has zero shot at this, but they can keep it within the number, especially given who Ohio State has after. Ohio State 35, Illinois 17
RockyMtnBlue: Don’t let shenanigans in Texas fool you, regardless how funny they were. OSU is winning the natty this year. Ohio State 42-13
Thumpasaurus: Ohio State can name their score, we have no front seven. Our secondary is decent in the way Chris Ash Rutgers had a decent secondary. On offense, we still only have one receiver so if Ohio State covers him like Duke did in the second half, there’s nothing we can do. No part of our running game works very well. This is a bad football team.
MNW: Bert's preseason comments about switching to a 3-3-5 stunned me then, and now that we've seen the early-season Illini...well, let's hope those five can really keep Jeremiah Smith under wraps. Buckeyes, 42-14.
UCLA Bruins @ Maryland Terrapins
12:30pm | BTN| UCLA -2.5 | O/U: 57.5
ATS: Terps 8-6 | Straight Up: Terps 8-6
Buffkomodo: Hell give me ucla.
Transient Buckeye: Cross-country trip to face September Maryland. Does UCLA start to come back to earth? Probably not this week.
IUinVA: UCLA’s defense has been getting scorched. It’s also a long flight and an early kick. I’ll take Maryland one last time this month.
misdreavus79: James Franklin is stronger than September, not sure Bob Chesney and East Coast Travel™ is stronger than September. Maryland 23, UCLA 20
RockyMtnBlue: I got burned last week when I followed the maxim “Never bet against Maryland in September” because I forgot that other maxim “Never bet on Maryland against James Franklin” (you should be unspeakably embarrassed that’s a thing, Maryland). Nonetheless, it’s still September, and James Franklin won’t be in the stadium this week. Maryland 21-20
Thumpasaurus: I continue to ride the UCLA train for all it’s worth because they can run the ball. That travels.
MNW: USC looked like ass against Rutgers. I'm extrapolating here, people, give me some room. Maryland, 24-17.
(3) Notre Dame Fighting Irish @ Purdue Boilermakers
1:00pm | Peacock | Notre Dame -27.5 | O/U: 57.5
ATS: Notre Dame 8-6 | Straight Up: All Ewww
Buffkomodo:Purdue has a good first quarter then loses the rest of the game by approximately 40.
Transient Buckeye: [train going off a collapsing bridge into a deep ravine.gif]
glass: The repugnance of last season hasn’t even washed off yet and now Notre Dame is going to win the National Title.
https://i.makeagif.com/media/2-21-2016/N6_koj.mp4 (If I am not allowed to post gifs this is The Seventh Seal Dance of Death dot gif)
IUinVA: Harbor, anyone? I don’t like taking a four touchdown favorite on the road against a team that has shown life, but how much of a “road” game will this really be? Ah, screw it. Trains cover.
misdreavus79: The defense isn’t fixed, but Purdue has scored on everybody so far and Notre Dame can’t run the ball, so there’s that. Notre Dame 135, Purdue 108
RockyMtnBlue: Purdue’s offense is…not sucky? Not great, but like, competent. Their defense, tho… Notre Dame 42-21
Thumpasaurus: Purdue looking alive going into their matchup with Illinois next week would concern the shit out of me. Book it.
MNW: UCLA's defense isn't that good and Purdue's defense is that bad. Notre Dame 45, Purdue 10.
(17) Iowa Hawkeyes @ (18) Michigan Wolverines
2:30pm | CBS | Michigan -5.5 | O/U: 38.5
ATS: Iowa 10-4 | Straight Up: Iowa 13-1
Buffkomodo: I believe in Iowa. How terrifying.
Transient Buckeye: Michigan wins while Iowa covers the spread, because that’s just how the universe goes these days.
IUinVA: I’ll take Iowa in an “Iowa” game.
misdreavus79: 38.5 seems a bit high, no? Iowa 5, Michigan 2 (yes, Iowa’s going to do it to you too)
RockyMtnBlue: Oh goodie. It’s Iowa vs Iowa-East again. It’s like a more-literate El Assico. I read somewhere that this is the lowest O/U of the entire college football season so far. Bet your house it isn’t low enough. Iowa wins the game 13-8, and the safety battle 2-1.
Thumpasaurus: Michigan is winning the national title this year. I called it after the Western game.
MNW: God, look at all that horrible piss color.
I like that in RMB's formulation, it likely means Iowa's got three field goals and two safeties, and Michigan's got a safety and two field goals. This is some 1889-era shit, and Brian Ferentz, for one, is wistful for a time in which over half the country's male African American population couldn't vote. Iowa, 20-13.
Wisconsin Badgers @ (13) Penn State Nittany Lions
4:00pm | Peacock | PSU -9.5 | O/U: 44.5
ATS: All PSU | Straight Up: All PSU
Buffkomodo: Wisconsin stinks and playing at Happy Valley is gonna be rough.
Transient Buckeye: Why is this line only 9.5? Nits win big.
IUinVA: This feels too easy, but I’ll bite and ride with Penn State.
misdreavus79: I am officially Concerned™ that everyone has picked Penn State to cover. Pray for me. Penn State 28, Wisconsin 13
RockyMtnBlue: Like TB, I am confused by this line. This seems like an easy pick. Penn State 31-13
Thumpasaurus: This game annoys me.
MNW: The Nittany Lion's cheek looks too big in this image. Wilford Brimley-ass jowls on that cat. PSU, 34-10.
Nebraska Cornhuskers @ Michigan State Spartans
4:00pm | BTN | Nebraska -5.5 | O/U: 48.5
ATS: MSU 9-5 | Straight Up: Nebraska 9-5
Buffkomodo: I think I split this but honestly shoulda picked sparty. Why? I guess why not.
Transient Buckeye: I’m taking the home dog to win outright. If Nebraska pulls this off, I might start to believe in them. (only to be inevitably disappointed later)
IUinVA: I feel pretty good about this Nebraska team. Something feels awry, possibly askew, perhaps even amiss. I hope I’m not being led astray.
misdreavus79: If anything, they can manage the same 27 Notre Dame did. Nebraska 27, Michigan State 20
RockyMtnBlue: Nebraska has looked kinda sneaky competent (a development of which I do not approve). But this just feels like a Charlie Brown game for Nebby fans. Michigan State 24-21
Thumpasaurus: I think Nebraska is better, but remember what happens to Pat Fitzgerald’s football opponent in the fourth quarter of every game. I would find an MSU win DEEPLY concerning. Book it.
MNW: lol wait did I REALLY?
Fitz is .500 against Nebraska in his career. None of that has been against Rhule, I don't think, but I don't doubt in his teams' ability to play decently fundamental football, since Jim O'Neill is not his defensive coordinator and Mike Bajakian is a Cleveland fuckin Brown. Sparty, 24-21.
(20) Oregon Ducks @ (12) USC Trojans
6:30pm | NBC | Oregon -3 | O/U: 62.5
ATS: Tie 7-7 | Straight Up: Tie 7-7
Buffkomodo: Has anyone actually watched Dante Moore be good? Like with their own eyes? Against a good team? And win? Give me USC.
Transient Buckeye: Are we sure the right team is favored here? I’m not. USC pulls the “upset.”
IUinVA: We’re all sooo impressed by your showing last week against hapless, Portland State last week, Ducks. I’ll take Southern Cal in a game that features many touchdowns.
misdreavus79: Vegas seems to have forgotten which team is at home. USC 77, Oregon 70
RockyMtnBlue: Who the hell knows? Oregon is very difficult to understand other than “interior O-Line might not be very good”, and USC is typical bizarro Iowa. Logic seems to favor the home team, but I dislike Oregon even more than USC (barely), so we know how it’ll turn out. Oregon 49-42 (seriously, POUND that “over”)
Thumpasaurus: Lincoln Riley is too soft for this
MNW: I just hope everyone has a good time and the TV checks keep clearing for Northwestern. Quacka, 42-38.
Minnesota Golden Gophers @ Washington Huskies
10:00pm | FOX | UDub -10 | O/U: 46.5
ATS: UDub 10-4 | Straight Up: UDub 13-1
Buffkomodo: Anything Utah State can do, Minny should theoretically be able to do better? I’ll take the Goophers
Transient Buckeye: This feels like the sort of game where the roadkill gophers show up. Huskies win and (barely) cover.
IUinVA: I don’t believe in Washington, but I definitely don’t believe in Minnesota. Huskies win by double digits.
misdreavus79: Demond Williams will be doing his best Kamario Taylor impression. Washington 38, Minnesota 17
RockyMtnBlue: Washington might have turned a corner last week. Tough to call, but that stadium is also an historically terrible place to visit. Come on, Minnesota. Prove me wrong! Washington 21-10
Thumpasaurus: One does not simply win at Washington
MNW: misdreavus, if Minnesota takes a Fetty Wapping at Washington, I will be positively elated.
PJ Fleck is going to do the same thing PJ Fleck always does: come out, sit on the ball, and have Drake Lindsey make one big throw that gets all the Gopher insiders tapping their noses and saying "See? He knows what he's doing!" These people are more gullible Iowans, and those dumbfucks vote for Joni Ernst.
Only thing that keeps this close(r) is that Washington just has not looked good moving the ball. I'm running Demond out in fantasy this week, where I'm 0-3, so perhaps I'm hedging by taking the Huskies in a squeaker here? Washington, 27-19.
Too Cowardly To Play
Rutgers (Howard)
Buffkomodo: Leave Rutger alone.
Transient Buckeye: Honestly, I don’t think we should be picking on Rutgers for picking on someone their own size.
IUinVA: Rutgers Howard sounds like the name of a Northwestern grad’s butler.
misdreavus79: It’ll be their only win this season, so I’ll allow it.
glass: Rutgers Howard was great in Blade Runner https://i.makeagif.com/media/9-11-2018/KlVKDr.gif
